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Friday, April 16, 2010

neighborly observations. part 1.

Welcome to what I like to refer to as "Neighborly Observations".  Let's set the stage, shall we?  We live in a lovely townhome subdivision right on the edge of one um... slightly less than ideal reputation'ed city & on the other edge, one of the most highly reputable cities in the US. Yep, we are seconds away from two of the highest rated school districts in the country (well, we're actually seconds away from one of those schools, as we are situated in one of those districts). Anyway, our address is that of the less than ideal city, but no biggie, right? In my experience thus far, a lot of people I know live in the less than ideal zip code.

I think that was more background than necessary, really, but we'll just go with it, cause I'm not one to edit blog posts. I much prefer the stream of consciousness randomness that comes from my brain directly onto this MacBook.

B & I took Tucker for a walk this morning. Tucker took B & I for a walk this morning. (Yep, much more truthful.)  Anyway, these are some thoughts I had during my bicep curling work out walk through our neighborhood.

  • Is it still considered a subdivision wide garage sale, if it's only 3 garages? 

  • Is it still considered a garage sale, if it's actually just two tables & some crap in your driveway because your garage is packed full of furniture piled on top of more furniture, looking exactly like someone out of Hoarders? 

  • Is it just me or does anyone laugh a little when they see a lovely lady get out of her Range Rover & pick up an item at a garage sale? (I know, I know, that's how those rich people stay rich- by being frugal). 

  • Is it wrong to throw approximately ten bags of dog poo in the public park garbage can? I hope not, cause I did it (it's that or pay for the waste management company to come pick up my trash that literally only has dog poo in it, I mean, that's kind of a rip off, if you ask me). 

  • Isn't it funny when you see older women running/walking in sneakers that are not running shoes & shorts that are not meant to work out in? As in jean shorts? Perhaps I should specify that by running/walking I really mean scurrying. Figure that one out, if you didn't go to Iowa State. I bet you can. 

  • Hey, where'd that punk thuggy mcthugster go, who used to park his car in the visitor parking, as if his mom couldn't see him smoking there, instead of in her driveway?  Did he finally pull up his pants, tuck in his 3x too big for him shirt, cut his greasy blond hair, buy some respectable shoes & get a job? Or go to college? Or high school?  Perhaps... I realize now I haven't seen him around lately.  I used to let Tucker drag me around the front yard, towards the mailbox, in hopes that he would be too scared to even think about breaking into our house, because of the ferocious, giant dog that drags that stay at home mom around... He was probably too busy lighting his next cigarette & digging for that lost Eminem cd to notice.  (And hey, really, I've been known to listen to Eminem too, but my shoes have always been respectable). 

  • And on to my dog.  Okay, so he's big.  I get that.  And I don't particularly like big dogs, except my own. And sometimes, I don't even like my own (but I always love him).  Anyway, I'm glad we have him, because my kid isn't terrified of dogs now.  Today we were being drug along walking along, rather pleasantly, when we meet up to another mom, her child in a stroller & another child riding his own bike. The child on the bike looked to be about three & he literally started screaming about Tucker.  I keep Tucker on a very short lease, especially when I see people coming, & while he likes to jump, he doesn't- not on kids anyway.  So anyway, as I'm walking away I'm honestly thinking "what a wuss!" Isn't that mean? Really, the kid is only three, so why shouldn't he be scared of some ferocious 85 pound dog?  Just because I know that Tucker would only kill you if he could lick you to death, or annoy you to death, doesn't mean that everyone else knows that.  And really, I prefer it that way.  Let thuggish ruggish white boys down the street think Tucker will eat them alive if they come near our house, it's much safer that way, right? 

And now my friends, it's time for lunch & I need to get back to that to do list- So far, I've only completed a few things.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This was really cute! I loved the part about Tucker and the 3 year old! I would have thought the same thing! LOL!